By L Schmidt, grateful patient of the NHS

Your aren’t the perfect partner and you sometimes let me down
You often are too busy, no time to play the clown
#But just like all relationships we try to muddle through
You do your best and still slip me a little smile or two
Your timing for some promised dates has sometimes made me mad
You have so many partners one could think you’re quite the cad
#But in truth you are pure of heart just smothered by the muddle
So many demands upon your time we need to clone you double!

Your fashion sense needs some work you know it makes me frown
You are just so damn practical with that bare back, weird, tied gown
#But the worst part of your dress sense really gets some flack
Those stockings that you make me wear? So NOT the new black
Of course I have to mention the lingerie you always buy
And those ‘Cinderella’ slippers that almost make me cry
#But not with tears of upset no that is just my humour
I hear they aren’t just for us girls or is that a nasty rumour?

The last few years I’ve needed you to give me much more time
I’ve even done some pouting and reminded you you’re mine
#But you didn’t get impatient you were careful not to ire
You do your best to keep me calm even under fire
At present we are on a break you said ‘You’re clear now go!’
You gave me a hug and I skipped off out, the wrong way don’t you know!
#But it is not a separation of that I can be sure
I know ‘we’ll meet again’ when I need a date once more.

You will have me back with open arms (once I’ve chased your butt)
You will give me your attention and again you’ll make the cut
#But as usual I’ll be worried and you will put me at my ease
You’re such a smoothie face to face aiming so to please
With all that said I have to raise a TINY little matter
I’ve heard some things about you in amongst the chatter
It seems someone is making you break our sacred pledge
I’ve heard you’re being shackled with some partners in some hedge?

I’ve been told you have no choice you have to sell your wares
To some pirates roving round the world trading in some shares
I’m no brains of Britain but I know it isn’t right
To let them sell your soul away without putting up a fight
I have to raise this question for others and for me
Is it really moral profiteering from misery?

They didn’t ask my opinion! No contract have I signed!
I’ve twittered and I’ve tweeted, the interweb I’ve mined!
There is no signed agreement from any of your babes!
Yes I mean me and millions more, sixty plus decades!!!
#BUT it seems we were cuckolded, mislead and lies were told
#BUT I won’t shut up about it this really is too bold!
Our only common ground built with blood and sweat and tears
Going to gamblers’ immoral earnings? No way! No sir! No fear!

Big Up the NHS!


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